POUR OUT A FULL HEART

I hope you can relate to my full heart . . . A heart so full of love that it must overflow. 

My wife and I have two children. They gave us three grandchildren - 1, 2 and 3.  We are still counting. 

Forgive my bias.  Our grandchildren are the sweetest, cutest, funniest and brightest little ones in the world.  But I am not biased. 

I watch them. I play with them. I read to them. I talk with them. I hold them. I think about them.  I do whatever they need me to do. I am their Saba.

I love when they get excited to see me. I love when they call my name, Saba. I love when they want me to pick them. I love when they give me hugs & kisses hello, and cherish their goodbye hugs & kisses.

I dream for them. I see them at 7, 11 and 13.  I start to become a bit sad when I see them much older when I am much older and they are starting to slip away because I am starting to slip away.  Then, my heart is still filled with love. 

Being a grandparent may be the best "being" there is. Being a husband is great. So is being a father and an uncle and a boss and leader. But being a grandparent is the best "being" for me.  

It is pure joy. There is no "but." There is never a doubt. There are no trade offs. Nothing feels like a sacrifice when it is for them.  There is no tinge of regret.  No offsetting negatives.  Being a grandparent is pure joy. 

Grandchildren fill my heart. I can pour out my love and it never empties.  

WHAT IF

What if there is a God and we were in the Garden of Eden?

What if that God is Spirit? What if that God has Angels? What if some of those Angels created an abomination? What if God destroyed the earth in the Great Flood to destroy that abomination? What if God scattered Nimrod's city and destroyed it's Tower of Babel?

What if there was a Moses? What if God showed Pharaoh signs? What if God led the Hebrews out of Egypt to be our God and on the first night we stayed in a place called Sukkout? What if God spoke to Moses on the Mountain? What if we have a Covenant and an obligation?

What if Jacob's tents were so lovely? What if a Generation wandered the desert until they perished because they were not faithful?

What if the next generation conquered the Promised Land? What if the Sound of seven Shofar blasts destroyed Jericho's walls?  What if having the Ark made it possible to defeat the Canaanites and many other's too.

What if we turned away and God withdrew his protection? What if God let our enemies destroy our Temple and sack Jerusalem?  What if we were taken as slaves and scattered unto the nations as it was foretold?

What if there is a God that has done all this?

What if God's providence was with George Washington? What if "Proclaim Liberty throughout the Land" are God's words and the God given purpose for America? What if our Nation was Founded in order that the prophecy to "gather his people" in the Promised Land again could be fulfilled? What if Patriotism to America and Israel is a way that we show our love for God?

What if "In God we Trust" becomes hallow words?

What if the Prophets were right and we are at the end of the second day and just before the third day? What if at the beginning of the third day the Messiah will rule for a thousand years?

What if Evil lurks among us too? What if Evil has it's angels? What if ravenous wolves do dress in sheep's clothing? What if we are being deceived by them?

What if God gave us signs but we ignored them and his Word? What if the Messiah is real and about to rule? What if our prayers are not acceptable because we worship false gods and follow the ways of Man? What if we hate in our heart rather than love our fellow?

What if Isaiah, Jeremiah, Ezekiel, Daniel, 

Hosea, Joel, Amos, Obadiah, Jonah, Micah, Nahum, Habakkuk, Zephaniah, Haggai, Zechariah, and Malachic were God's prophets? 

What if Elijah and Elisha, Gad, Micaiah, Nathan and Samuel were prophets too?  

. . .  And we what if we didn't know them?  What if they had prophecy for us? What if we ignored their prophecy?

What if there is a Righteous path and we didn't choose it? What if there is a God but we lacked faith?

What if we have been deceived? 

What if there is price to pay for pursuing empty folly? What if we forsake our own welfare?  What if God proclaimed Judgment on us like Nineveh? What if we wait past the Messiah to believe? What if then it is too late?

What makes us think that if we do not have faith, and do not know the prophets and do not study the Word that we will recognize the true Messiah? What makes us think if we wait for Judgment to find these things that we will be acceptable to God?

What if we put our faith in God?  What if we recognized the Evil forces and acknowledged our false gods?

What if we loved our fellow?  

What if there was a Garden of Eden? What if we could be born again?  What if there is ONE GOD and we are ONE?

OUT OF MANY, ONE!

FEAR DEATH THAT YOU MIGHT CHOOSE LIFE

The Unetanah Tokef prayer is a very special liturgical poem that is chanted on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur.

This link offers the words and an explanation of the Unetanah Tokef. Here is a link to an audio performance by one of histories greatest cantors, Naftali Hertstik.

The Unetanah Tokef peom is based on concepts of Jewish apocalyptic literature which parallel Christian writings based on similar sources.

Whereas Christian liturgy concerning judgment focuses on Revelation and a single "End Times" Judgment, Jews view the High Holy Days as a recurring annual time of Judgment.

You might say we Jews keep doing a rehearsal to get ready for when the Messiah comes. But in essence, the Jews and Christians are both preparing for the "Main Event" each in their own way. Either way, the concept of Judgment Day is meant to strike fear.

FEAR like all God given emotions serves a purpose. I find it interesting that God has given us the emotion of fear to help save us. Whether it is fear of risky behaviors and risky situations which may injure us, or fear of a person who might hurt or kill us, fear serves the purpose to "save us." It offers us an opportunity to change our path. Evidently, Jonah struck enormous fear in the hearts of the people in Nineveh. Failure to listen to our fears can have serious consequences.

Because fear is so powerful, it is often exploited by evil forces.  In addition, there are times we need to overcome our fears in order to achieve greatness.

It is fair to say that all of our emotions have to managed.  Emotional stability is key to a healthy, happy and productive life overall. I digress ... back to FEAR.

Fear of an imagined death associated with "Judgment Day" serves a more profound purpose. The fear of an eternal life in Heaven or Hell, presents us with a powerful choice about our behavior now. It is the ultimate free will.

Fear of the consequences of "Judgment Day" is "designed" to "Save us."  "It is not sinners that God seeks." Fear is God's way of encouraging us to choose life everlasting.

Ironically, the change in behavior that the fear of Judgment helps to create leads to a better life and a better world.  Jews and Christians end up in the same place. Heaven on earth ruled by the same King and God.

HEAR, I AM.

Have our prayers been insincere? Or our charity inadequate?  Is it more repentance that You demand?

Or have we simply failed to see the signs - through the Words of Your prophets.

DANIEL Chapter 9:
7 To You, O Lord, is the righteousness, and to us is the shamefacedness as of this day, to the people of Judah, to the inhabitants of Jerusalem, and to all Israel both near and far, in all the lands to which you have driven them for the treachery that they have perpetrated toward You.
.....
10 And we have not hearkened to the voice of the Lord our God, to follow His teachings, which He placed before us by the hand of His servants, the prophets.
.....
13 As is written in the Law of Moses, all this evil has come upon us, and we did not entreat the countenance of the Lord our God to repent of our iniquities and to contemplate Your truth
.....
16 O Lord, according to all Your righteousness, may Your wrath and Your anger return now from Your city, Jerusalem, the mount of Your Sanctuary, for because of our sins and because of the iniquities of our forefathers, Jerusalem and Your people have become a mockery to all those surrounding us.
.....
19 O Lord, hear; O Lord, forgive; O Lord, hearken and do, do not delay; for Your sake, my God, for Your Name is called upon Your city and upon Your people."

Here we are again on the Day of Atonement, Yom Kippur. Having sounded Your Trumpets. Standing where we have stood for 2000 thousand years before the Torah. Repeating the Words as they appeared even before that. 

As we did for 70 "weeks" before Jerusalem fell. Offering the Atonement that we offered before we were sent into exile as the Diaspora. Reciting the same prayers we said before England and Spain expelled us and forced us to rip up our roots. Repenting and fasting before the pogroms. Performing the rituals and honoring Your Yamim Tovim, Your Festivals and the feasts of Pesach (Passover), Shavuot (Weeks or Pentecost), and Sukkot (Tabernacles, Tents or Booths) before the Holocaust.

Surely You want us to be close to You or You would not have placed us in Your Garden and walked with us alone in Your vast universe! 

Even when the earth was corrupted You held onto us and did not let us perish during the Great Flood.

LORD, You spoke to us through Moses to lead us out of bondage in Egypt and we have declared to the world ever since that You are the ONE God.

Have we not kept Your Ten Commandments?
Were our offerings not sufficient?
What use are our prayers? 
What value is our repentance?
Are our sins too great? 

Your Providence established the great nation of America. Founded to Proclaim Liberty. Built on the Foundation of Your Word - In God we Trust. Have we not been a Blessing to Israel?

LOOK AT US NOW. 

Do we Trust in God? 
Do we hear God's Prophets?
Could it be that God heard our prayers but we failed to hear his?

Daniel 9:23 In the beginning of your supplications, a word came forth, and I have come to tell it, for you have desirable qualities; now contemplate the word and understand the vision.

TODAY, YOM KIPPUR, JEWS READ THE BOOK OF JONAH. IT IS SAID "THERE WAS NO GREATER SIGN" THAN GOD'S PROPHET JONAH.

NO LONGER A LAUGHING MATTER

The situation in comedy is no longer a laughing matter. 

THE LEFT IS DESTROYING COMEDY. BUT THE BEAR HAS A-WOKE-N.

SNL's firing of Shane Gillis is the last straw. The Left's vindictive and nearly Fascist "cancel culture" has gone too far for too long.

Kevin Hart gets it. Dave Chappelle gets it. Bill Burr gets it.  Norm Macdonald gets it and in a recent tweet he has "declared" war.

Hundreds of other comedians get it too. So do tens of millions of Americans. But comedians have special sensitivities and sensibilities.

Comedians see into our culture, our society and human behavior in deeper and more profound ways than the average citizen.  Their livelihood depends on it. So when legends like Dave Chappelle and Norm Macdonald say we got a problem in America, America's GOT A PROBLEM!

The 1st and 2nd Amendments of our Constitution are under attack. The importance of these two Amendments to the Framers is self-evident by virtue of the fact that they are 1st and 2nd. "The pen is mightier than the sword."

Our Founding Fathers were deeply fearful of the tendencies of human nature. They were afraid that the people running our Country would eventually destroy this unique creation they called The United States of America.

The Founders knew it wasn't enough that they fought the Revolution and won despite terrible odds. They knew the Articles of the Confederation* were not enough so they created the Constitution to replace it.

The Framers did everything they could to protect Americans from their Government and the human beings that run it.

Norm Macdonald is absolutely right - America is at war. There is a non-military Revolution going on in our Country.

The Left is attacking America's conservative traditional values on every major front including but not limited to: Religion and morality, the Constitution, Culture, our Economic system and the most basic practice of Patriotism.

Even the classic meaning of being a Liberal or a Feminist is under attack. Today's Leftist is not yesterday's Liberal. And the 3rd Wave of Feminism is an abomination of the original. Today's Democratic Party is off the rails.

The Left has also attacked the Office of the President in a coup attempt. The Deep State will stop at nothing.

Sadly, one of the most important institutions we have for protecting us from our government has become as corrupt and Partisan as politics.  The Press is no longer a servant of the People.  Fake News is "the enemy of the people."

The Framers also believed that our Nation was created with Divine providence. Look at BOTH sides of our Great Seal -- it is obvious. The Founders knew they had more too fear than human nature. If God stops favoring America our Country is doomed.

America was Founded and built on Judeo Christian values. The Founders knew that even the Constitution was not enough for a Godless Nation.

I suspect that if a false Messiah were to rise up, otherwise known as the Antichrist by Christians, the Left would follow him too.

This situation is no laughing matter. Who knows that better than comedians?!

If/When Trump wins the 2020 Election, the last laugh will be on the Left. Their cruel and vindictive "cancel culture, as well as the way they have been destroying people's life and reputation for political purposes,  will be partly the reason why they lost.

#WALKAWAY
#BLEXIT
#JEXODUS

* The Articles of Confederation and Perpetual Union was the approved by the 2nd Continental Congress in 1777 and served as our Constitution for the 13 original United States of America that served as its first constitution.

P.S. I do favor laws and regulations which will help prevent the wrong people from obtaining dangerous weapons.  But I believe we can mitigate the problems of gun violence without violating our Constitution.

Part 5 - Midrash on the Story of Jonah: Revelation

The angels whispered prophecy into my mother's ear and she named me Robert Jonah.

Kabbalah teaches that parents are given "one sixth prophecy to choose a name for their child."  Throughout the Torah, names are profoundly significant. 

Three years ago today on Taslich,  I elevated my Hebrew middle name Jonah. Prior to that I was known most commonly by my first name, Bobby, in my childhood years.

My personal Jewish identity is entwined with Jonah from the Book of Jonah. However, my personal understanding of the Book of Jonah did not quite fit with what I have been taught by my Rabbis over my lifetime.  

I have always felt the Rabbis where missing an important part of the story. 

This midrash expresses my personal interpretation of The Book of Jonah. This is the 5th chapter in a five part series which I began 3 years ago. 

The first four chapters set an important foundation for this chapter.  Here are links to all of them including the explanation of how my journey from Robert to Jonah started.

Call Me By My Other Name.
Chapter I.
Chapter II.
Chapter III.
Chapter IV.

This 5th chapter has been missing all my life. (See footnote below.) In order to write this 5th chapter I needed a revelation.

Before I could write this 5th chapter, the 5th chapter had to write itself in my life.

Each of my four previous chapters were written in first person and this one is as well.  So now, as I literally start to write my midrash I will be writing as though I am the "Jonah" who is speaking to God. I pray for the words to come to me NOW.

My Midrash begins:

Oh mighty God, when Nimrod built Babel You delivered judgment by Your own hand.  Nimrod built Nineveh too, and there is much wickedness in the name of their false gods.

I know that it is not sinners that You seek God. But Nineveh is a warring and lustful city filled by mine enemies. No place has been more deserving of Your judgment.

Such is the fate for any place that turns from You and follows the way of false gods or the ways of Man.

As it is written Deuteronomy 12:2You must utterly destroy all the places where the nations that you will dispossess served their gods—on the high mountains and on the hills and under every green tree.3You are to tear down their altars, smash their pillars, burn their Asherah poles in the fire and cut down the carved images of their gods, and you are to obliterate their name from that place.

There is no place for one to hide from Your sight LORD. Nor am I ashamed of my nakedness like Adam & Eve. Lest they say of me otherwise I do declare, I didn't abandon your calling God. I objected to it!

But who am I to bring the threat of the ONE God they do not know in Nineveh?  YET, It is not the fear of death that sends me running! I know Your power.

It is the fear of offering my enemies an opportunity for redemption that frightens me.  For I also know Your power to forgive.

I would rather die than give the Assyrians fair warning of Your coming and offer them the chance to ask for and receive Your forgiveness. How could I do this to my people? How can You God? Bring Your judgment down!

Is it Judgment you wish to declare, or forgiveness you wish to provide?  Do you send me to save my worst enemies?

I sought You for greater  understanding. In the hull of the ship on it's way to Tarshis I called for You in my dreams. But You delivered no response.

Only the captain spoke. Your great seas were angry on my account.

In my loneliness I knew I sinned by failing to follow Your command.  There was a price to be paid.  A sacrifice to be made.

Cast me off! Let the sailors not die on my account. Send me into the deep. Deliver me to Your judgment!

But lo and behold, You forsake me not. Three days inside the deep.  Then You returned me from the deep with fresh eyes and clear conviction.

You filled me with needed understanding.  I went to Nineveh with great Thanksgiving.  Firm was my belief that the Ninivites would forsake their own welfare by continuing to cling to the folly of their ways and to their gods. Deliverance would be the LORDS!  Hallelujah!!

Knowing what I believed I ran to You by going to Nineveh to declare Your judgment in 40 days. I went with complete and unwavering faith. I went with a new life which belongs to you. I had no fear. Why should I fear, when Your Temple awaits me.

I took care and listened to your command that it may go well for my children and their children after me. Nineveh was to be cut off and dispossessed.  For every abomination of You which You hate the people there have done. They even burn their sons and daughters in the fire to their gods. [Deut. 12:31] No good fruit can come from a tree in Nineveh. The city must be cut down.

Unlike your other prophets I went without any signs or miracles to display.  I went without David's sling or Judah's army. I went to do Your command with only Your word.

Such is the Power of Your Word delivered by Your faithful and fearless servant. I was Your Trumpet blast and they heard You in all the land. Every person in Nineveh trembled in awe. They didn't turn to their gods. They turned to the ONE GOD.

All the people, including their king, bowed down and repented. Not to my surprise, but rather to my great regret.

From the hillside I watched and waited. I waited for Your judgment to come down on Nineveh.  And when You sparred my enemies it saddened me deeply.  So deeply LORD that I wished to die again.

I had gone to Nineveh to see the evil city receive Your judgment, not Your forgiveness.

But it was not to be Your will. I had done your will. And Your will WAS done. I should have rejoiced. Instead I morned.

I knew You were a compassionate God. My greatest fear was realized --  that You would grant forgiveness rather than deliver judgment on the city of Nineveh.

In my loneliness You came to me again. With a short lesson in the form of shade tree. But it is not Your capacity to offer forgiveness to sinners that confuses me.

A great tragedy has occurred.  What of Your chosen people?  By doing Your Will have I not delivered Your people to mine enemies?

Your decision to spare the Assyrians is a great tragedy for the ages. What have I done?  How do your people reconcile Your ways God?

I thought I knew better when you raised me from the deep and set me on the shore to go to Nineveh.  But little did I know.  There was a greater lesson for me to learn. Little did I know that You had another purpose for me. I was to be a great sign of Your forgiveness.

Through my story I was to foretell an even greater story.  My sadness would become joy to the world.

My life was to be a lesson. Tragedy befalls us throughout history and in our lives. If these are by Your hand we ask, "have you no compassion on us?" But if these tragedy are the price for our sins how are we to satisfy You?  We fail again and again.  Even Jacob, Moses and King David failed You.

What of Nineveh? How can they be worthy of Your Promise Land while Moses is not?!

You have given us a sign. There is no greater sign of Your capacity for forgiveness.  No greater sign that your gates remain open until the last moment. Even to a sinner. Even to a city of sinners.

But even a great city filled with Your chosen people will be judged if they fail and follow other nations and the ways of Men.

You, the One and only God provided me with a great gift - a gift that is rarely accepted.  The chance to be born again in Your waters.  You have given us the opportunity to make new choices.  To choose the path You wish for us all - that we may follow Your ways and serve you.

You have proven by Your Acts that You are always ready to forgive us.  This is the lesson of Nineveh.  But what of me, your servant.  I did Your will and now I must bear the burden of knowing that I have delivered my enemies to You to be spared.

The people of Nineveh love darkness, they will go back to their evil ways.  And when the evil spirit returns it will bring seven times more evil. The condition in Nineveh will be worse than first for this evil generation.

You knew this God. This is Your prophecy, not mine.  What lesson is there which You can give me to help me bear my pain for the evil that the people of Nineveh will bring upon my people?

So terrible was my sadness that I wished to die, again. The same death I wished for on the boat to Tarshis for the same reason I first refused to go to Nineveh.

I cry out to You NOW, today, through my midrash.

How am I to understand your mysterious ways? 

You answered me. Now I see how your answer was there for me since the beginning of Man.

We were never meant to judge the good and evil in another's heart.

Once we walked together in the Garden.  When we chose to eat from the Tree of Knowledge we had to leave the Garden.

The path back is your Word. And even that must be guarded because ravenous wolves in sheep's clothing are always seeking to confuse us.

The evil did return to Nineveh. But it was not for me to judge what is in their hearts' on the day You accepted their repentance as sufficient.

Tragedy tests our faith.  Tragedy can also return us to You.

But it is Hate in our heart, and the ways of Man with false and no Gods, which takes us from a path to You.

We needn't fear sheep in wool. It is Wolves in sheep's clothing that speak to deceive us.

Therefore until our last breath, we must always seek You through Your Word. We must inscribe Your Word in all places before our way.  So we do Your way.  Then upon our last breadth we will be received to You.

I see, through my midrash, that You have sent Jonah to be a sign that it is not sinners that You seek. Rather it is sinners that You seek to save.  The fearless ONE with pure faith and passion can show the way to even the most lost sinners. You have used my enemies to strengthen the faith of future generations. 

As for me, I will stay here where You have sent me. Your question gives my life new purpose.  I put my life in your hands. 

I tested your Word.  My midrash is such a test. By faith and Your Grace your Temple awaits me.

Baruch Hashem
Jonah, Jonah



Footnote:  The 5th letter of the Hebrew alphabet is Hei, pronounced "Hey."  The ancient symbol for Hei looks like a man with his arms raised. The symbol of Hei has the meanings:  Look, Reveal, Breath.

The numerical equivalent of Hei is the number 5.  In gematria Hei is associated with revalation and grace.  

More on the Hebrew Gematria of Five: Not only does the hei repre­sent the garments of thought, speech and action, but these garments comprise a total of five elements: Two levels of thought, imaginative and meditative; two levels of speech, the words of the heart and the words of the lips; and one level of action. 

Hei/Five also signifies the five levels of the soul: 
nefesh, ruach, neshamah, chayah and yechidah. The fifth tier, yechidah, means union.

3 Days, 3 years - My Personal Jonah Story

They who cling to empty folly Forsake their own welfare. Jonah 2:10.                     

"But I, with loud thanksgiving,

Will sacrifice to You;

What I have vowed I will perform.

Deliverance is the LORD’S!"

From Book of Jonah

It was three days in the belly before God put Jonah back on land to perform what he was commanded. It was three days walk across the great city of Nineveh that Jonah was called to declare would face "JUDGMENT" and be overthrown in 40 days.

On Sunday September 29th it will be the three year anniversary of the Taslich when I elevated my middle name Jonah.  Three years since this.

Three years since I raised my awareness and opened my mind and heart to find a even greater understanding of God. Three more years of studying and searching.

What did I find? What have I personally discovered?  I have found more than I imagined when I began.  What I found has enabled me to write the last chapter in my personal midrash about The Book of Jonah.

In the Book of Jonah, the evil Assyrians repent and God does not overthrow the city.  It would seem that the story is about Repentance and Forgiveness.  So it is very fitting that Jews tell the Book of Jonah on Yom Kippur, the Hebrew Day of Atonement.

Nearly all my life I believed that there was something not quite right about how the Rabbis were interpreting the Book of Jonah.  The message and meaning was incomplete.  There was something profoundly missing.

I have been on a lifelong journey to complete the story.  For me, that journey took on a much deeper and more spiritual purpose when I did Taslich 3 years ago -- When I cast off "fear" on the water, and asked friends to call me by my middle name Jonah for the first time.

That moment, captured by someone who sent me the photo you see above was truly an amazing spiritual and intimate experience with God.  I felt different.  I became different.  But I didn't know where my heart, God was leading me.

THE BOOK OF NACHUM v.14.

"The Lord has given a command concerning you, Nineveh:    “You will have no descendants to bear your name. I will destroy the images and idols that are in the temple of your gods.I will prepare your grave, for you are vile.”"

Very Soon I plan to write the 5th chapter in my midrash based on my understanding of the Jonah story. When I do I will share on my blog.

I will publish that during the High Holy Days.  It has yet to be "penned."  Besides, I want to be open to more meaning and greater blessings between now and the Holiday.  Whatever they may be. Deliverance is the Lord's!  (Baruch HaShem.)

Please pray with me.
Shalom,
Jonah